Circle of Security

First Wave Families Staff
Jun 17
4 min read

Updated: Jun 18

Understanding the Circle of Security and Attachment Theory for Parents

As a parent, you’re likely constantly thinking about your child’s well-being, especially their emotional health. It's normal to want your child to feel safe, loved, and understood, especially during their earliest years. One incredibly effective way to support your child’s emotional development is by understanding and applying a concept called the Circle of Security.

What is the Circle of Security?

At its simplest, the Circle of Security is a tool designed to help parents understand their child’s emotional needs. It’s based on the idea that children have two primary needs in their emotional development:

The need to explore and discover the world (this is the child’s need for independence and curiosity).
The need to return to a safe base for comfort and reassurance (this is the child’s need for security, trust, and emotional support).

In the Circle of Security model, the "safe base" and the "exploration zone" work together. The “safe base” is where your child feels loved, supported, and confident enough to return to when they feel uncertain or need comfort. The “exploration zone” is where they feel free to explore the world, knowing they have a secure base to come back to whenever necessary.

Think of it like this: children need to feel secure enough to venture into the world and learn new things, but they also need to know there’s a place where they can always return for comfort when they feel overwhelmed or unsure.

This model is grounded in attachment theory, which forms the backbone of the Circle of Security framework.

What is Attachment Theory?

Attachment theory, first developed by psychologist John Bowlby, is the idea that early relationships with caregivers form the foundation for a child’s emotional development. Bowlby proposed that children are biologically programmed to form strong emotional bonds with their primary caregivers (usually parents). These early attachments are critical because they shape how children perceive the world, how they relate to others, and how they manage their emotions throughout life.

The core idea of attachment theory is that children need a stable, responsive caregiver to feel safe and secure. This attachment bond affects how they behave in the world and how they build relationships as they grow older. The Circle of Security is built on this foundational understanding that children need a secure base to explore their world confidently and to regulate their emotions.

When parents are tuned into their child’s needs for both connection and exploration, they help nurture secure attachment, which supports the child’s development of trust, emotional regulation, and resilience.

Why is the Circle of Security Important for Parents of Infants, Toddlers, and Preschoolers?

Children, especially in their early years, are still learning how to navigate their emotions. Infants, toddlers, and preschoolers are figuring out how to express their feelings, deal with frustration, and understand the world around them. By being attuned to your child’s needs and offering consistent emotional support, you provide them with a solid foundation for emotional growth.

For infants, understanding the Circle of Security helps you recognize when they need comfort or when they’re ready to explore, even if it’s just with a curious gaze or reaching out for a toy. Your timely responses help build their attachment to you, making them feel secure.
For toddlers, this framework supports their growing independence while giving them reassurance that they have a "safe base" to return to when needed. Toddlers are naturally exploring their boundaries, but knowing they can come back to you when they feel scared or uncertain helps them feel safe.
For preschoolers, the Circle of Security encourages emotional regulation. When children feel safe, they learn to trust their feelings and manage them better. It’s also during this stage that children begin to build relationships with others, and having a secure attachment with their primary caregiver helps them navigate social situations more confidently.

By being mindful of the Circle of Security and attachment theory, you can be a more responsive parent, strengthening the bond with your child and helping them grow emotionally.

Our Center’s New 8-Week Circle of Security Program

We’re excited to announce that First Wave Families will be offering an 8-week Circle of Security program designed specifically for parents of infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. Whether you're a new parent or have some experience under your belt, this program will offer valuable insights into how you can build a stronger connection with your child while also fostering their emotional growth.

The program will cover:

Understanding your child’s emotional needs: Learn how to identify when your child needs comfort versus when they are ready to explore.
Building a secure attachment: We’ll help you recognize the key elements of secure attachment and how it lays the groundwork for emotional regulation.
Responding to your child’s cues: Gain practical skills on how to respond to your child in a way that promotes security and trust.
Real-life examples and practical strategies: In addition to theory, we’ll share examples and tools you can implement immediately.

This program is designed not just to teach you about attachment theory, but to equip you with real, actionable strategies to help you strengthen your relationship with your child.

Building a secure bond with your child now sets the stage for their emotional success later in life.